Author Topic: Septet  (Read 3213 times)

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Patrick O'Keefe

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Re: Septet
« Reply #15 on: April 22, 2019, 11:38:19 AM »
However, in toto, it feels a bit 'samey' to me. You have the eighth-sixteenth-sixteenth motive all over the place. You could get some development going and increase the variety by changing that motive around a little here and there. Change it to an eighth note triplet in spots, for example, or have it be sixteenth-sixteen-eighth, or change the melodic dyad into a three note arpeggio, and so on. This would liven up the motive and help keep it from getting repetitive.
I've been buried in non-music for the past few weeks.  I've made lots of changes but haven't put together a clean version to post.  And now I'm afraid the changes I've made have probably made it even more "samey".  Maybe I'll try some of your suggestions before posting a new copy.

Patrick O'Keefe

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Re: Septet
« Reply #16 on: April 23, 2019, 08:42:00 PM »
The link at the beginning of this thread now point to an updated version.  I probably won't be able to attend to any comments for a few days.

Patrick O'Keefe

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Re: Septet
« Reply #17 on: June 04, 2019, 09:11:19 PM »
I had forgotten this thread.  The piece is now definitely a multi-movement work  The 1st movement is essentially (except that I tweak it every week or so). The 2nd movement is complete until I decide it's not.  The 2nd movement is undergoing changes to be posted soon.   At least the form is pretty much set.  It's ABA form with the A section slow, The slow, quiet section returns, and is obviously modeled on the initial A section, but the motifs have changed a bit and are in a different order.

I have not started thinking about the 3rd movement, but it will probably be the last movement.   
« Last Edit: June 05, 2019, 10:11:29 AM by Patrick O'Keefe »

Patrick O'Keefe

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Re: Septet
« Reply #18 on: December 08, 2019, 03:59:02 PM »
Judging from my last update of this thread, I'd say I've been away from the forum for about 6 months.  (A knee replacement, a hip replacement, and a smattering of oral surgery has been occupying my time.)

I've updated the links in the first posting of the thread.  They've been messed up for 6 months, I guess.  And I've added links to the 3rd movement.  The first two movements are essentially done.  I find things to tweak every time I look at them, of course, and I'll still consider suggested changes, but they are pretty much finished.  The 3rd movement wants to be done, but I keep changing it daily.

Comments and suggestions are welcome. 

BTW, I see that I have title, composer, and copyright information on page 5 as if it were the 1st page.  I've obviously done something weird in my notation software (Sibelius).  I will fix it soon.  Fixed.
« Last Edit: December 10, 2019, 12:39:57 PM by Patrick O'Keefe »

Patrick O'Keefe

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Re: Septet
« Reply #19 on: December 16, 2019, 11:22:32 AM »
I decided the 3rd movement was too slow so I've upped the tempo.  With that change I thought I'd better remove some 16th note pizz.  I think I didn't lose much by that. 

I'm now worried a bit about all the rapid staccato.  Is this going to be too tiring for the winds?  And should I make some the the string's staccato one of the various bouncing bow techniques?  Is this something I leave for the discretion of the player?  I want short, sharp, well separated notes.  I'm not sure I care how it is achieved, but maybe I just know too little about the sound produced by the different techniques. 

mjf1947

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Re: Septet
« Reply #20 on: December 16, 2019, 11:36:26 AM »
Firstly ..... it is a lovely/lively movement with lots of heart.

As per your question .... As an orchestra woodwind player (Oboe) I do not see any problem with the tempo and articulation within the work.  There are places to breathe ......

Mark


Patrick O'Keefe

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Re: Septet
« Reply #21 on: December 16, 2019, 12:19:13 PM »
Mark, thanks for your comments.  I'll worry less about the winds now.

I forgot to mention in my last post that I re-notated parts of the movement - mostly in the strings - to emphasize the 6-against-4 rhythm that appears in several places.  I know that the standard beaming for 12/8 is to beam 3 8th notes together, but I decided to beam pairs of 8th notes for instruments playing the 6-beat figure.  I don't know if that is standard practice, but I think it helps clarify the rhythm.  If it is confusing, I'll change it back.

sandalwood

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Re: Septet
« Reply #22 on: December 16, 2019, 02:47:21 PM »
Patrick, I enjoyed this 3rd mvt a lot. I believe it is folk material inspiration put to excellent use and I think it works very well. It makes the beautiful and exciting rhythm sing, as I hear it. Many fine passages... for instance one from m.27. I particularly like the growing intensity with thickening of the texture in the finale (I feel it could get even more berserk).  And it sounds well-finished to me; nothing sagging or disturbing.  Listening to the piece it occured to me that a mostly p dynamics,  contrapuntal and perhaps a notch or two faster pizz. passage in the second half for contrast might make the piece even more colorful. Many such ideas of mine just don't work, so please take it with a grain ...  :)

Patrick O'Keefe

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Re: Septet
« Reply #23 on: December 16, 2019, 03:57:12 PM »
Listening to the piece it occured to me that a mostly p dynamics,  contrapuntal and perhaps a notch or two faster pizz. passage in the second half for contrast might make the piece even more colorful.
I'll see what I can do with that idea.  I've already got a contrapuntal section the starts p - the fugato at G.  No pizz. in it, And I need it to crescendo to H.  But I can make it speed up and have the last section faster.  I'll give it a try.

sandalwood

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Re: Septet
« Reply #24 on: December 16, 2019, 04:25:10 PM »
What I mean is a pizz. strings only passage (like in Bartok quartet 4) or perhaps with some minimal arco interspersed like in some passages of Ravel (quartet). I'm saying these just to explain myself, not because I'm confident about my idea.  :)
« Last Edit: December 18, 2019, 07:28:21 AM by sandalwood »

Patrick O'Keefe

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Re: Septet
« Reply #25 on: December 16, 2019, 05:03:54 PM »
Hmm.  I'll see if I can fit that in.  I could, of course, insert a pizz.-only transitional measure, but I'll see if an existing section could become pizz.-only.  (No promises.)

sandalwood

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Re: Septet
« Reply #26 on: December 18, 2019, 07:32:06 AM »
Hmm.  I'll see if I can fit that in.  I could, of course, insert a pizz.-only transitional measure, but I'll see if an existing section could become pizz.-only.  (No promises.)

Please don't let my bright(!) ideas "create no [any] trouble in thy breast" :)
« Last Edit: December 18, 2019, 10:55:22 AM by sandalwood »

whitebark

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Re: Septet
« Reply #27 on: December 18, 2019, 02:09:51 PM »
Hi Patrick,
Your new third movement is wonderful.  It sounds polished and I have no suggestions for improvement.  The gigue-like flavor of the piece certainly provides a lively and satisfying finish to the Septet. Thanks for sharing it!

Jay

Patrick O'Keefe

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Re: Septet
« Reply #28 on: December 18, 2019, 06:45:38 PM »
Thanks for the kind words.  I'm still tweaking it a bit.  A pizz.-only section came into existence and then shrank almost out of existence.  It may continue shrinking because I'm not sure it added anything useful.  I made a few other changes here and there, too.

Patrick O'Keefe

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Re: Septet
« Reply #29 on: December 19, 2019, 05:35:36 PM »
Well, the pizz.-only section is gone.  I decided I just didn't like it as well as what I had had before.  I made other tweaks (and will continue to make them), but think I'm mostly done.  I suspect my next major task will be score prep.  (Ugh!)